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First of all, besides the satisfaction you get from socializing with another human being, there’re a lot of things you can know from interacting with people in person that you can’t get through dating apps. Besides, most dating profiles are not accurate representations of people. The convenience of simply swiping on dating apps can make you neglect opportunities to interact with potential romantic partners around you. And this will make you miss out on great opportunities. It’s okay to show a woman that you care about her. But most guys go too far trying to make a woman accept them. Their need for approval stems from a place of insecurity. A man’s need for acceptance might make him lie or omit details about himself that he thinks the girl may not like.
Work through your baggage. Everyone has a few scrapes and scars from previous experiences that can creep into their love lives. For instance, maybe your parents failed to show you consistent affection, and now you find yourself being extra needy in relationships. Or maybe your ex cheated on you, leaving you with some serious trust issues. Regardless of what baggage you’re carrying around, it’s time to dig deep and work through it. Otherwise, it may prove next to impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone new. Bottom line? Clear your mind of “the one who got away” and you’ll have a much easier time recognizing someone great when you see them. Whether that means meditating, working with a therapist or dating coach, practicing self-care, or keeping yourself busy with healthy distractions, the point is that you’ll be far more likely to actually achieve your romantic goals IRL, rather than just in your head.
For instance, working with a matchmaker can be a game-changer. I can help get to the bottom of what your real dating priorities, values, and dealbreakers are, and then connect you with other like-minded singles who actually complement your lifestyle. Moreover, I help to separate your needs from your wants, which is a crucial exercise for setting realistic expectations and ultimately, finding happiness. If you aren’t ready to work with a matchmaker or can’t afford one, consider asking a trusted friend, sibling, or coworker if they know any single people they think would be a good match for you. Who knows? You may just be surprised that the people who know you best have a better picker than you do — because they can see from an unbiased perspective what it is you really need from a partner.
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